some random quotes
I'm presenting some random quotes here for your reading pleasure.
These are things that I've come across this past week. The first two are from the movie Mystery Men, which I picked up on DVD for ten bucks yesterday.
"We've got a blind date with destiny! And it looks like she's ordered the lobster!" - The Shoveller
"We are number one! All others are number two or lower!" - The Sphinx
These next few are from the listening section of an English test that I administered to a class at work. If you've ever heard an instructional tape for learning English, or perhaps another language, just imagine the slow, awkward speech of the voice, er, talent. They definitely need lessons in voice acting.
The following exercise involved listening to a question and then of three responses, choosing the correct one. Only the humourous responses are included.
Question: Are you ok?
Response #1: Take me please!
Response #2: I think I am very special.
Question: Will you teach me to sing?
Response: I sing to make you angry.
The next part involved listening to a conversation and then answering questions about it.
Man: What are you doing?
Woman: I'm painting.
Man: What is it?
Woman: It's a snake.
Man: [very fake laugh] Ha ha! Snakes don't have feet, stupid!